Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
