He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Randomize
