For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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