fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
