it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
My ass is underappreciated
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
