If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
