This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Randomize
