I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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