you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
