She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
Dick very happy bro
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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