I wish I could teleport
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
