i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
