Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I intend to get homeless drunk
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Randomize
