I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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