Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(407): View more from Florida

I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms

Fav 5 974 1404
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(818): View more from California

Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?

(770): View more from Georgia

I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.

Fav 14 2328 1123
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(314): View more from Missouri

Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.

Fav 17 5274 1523
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(815): View more from Illinois

Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.

Fav 2 76 8
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(806): View more from Texas

I'm like a great zombie Jesus.

Fav 0 8 21
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