yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize
