and next time when you feel me up, do it right
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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