That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
