Don't you send me to vm
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
Never joke about your clitoris.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
