Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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