Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
