Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
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