I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Actions speak louder than pants.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
