Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
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