you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
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