I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
Randomize