We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
Randomize