Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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