youre lurking in front of me
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
