Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
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