Non-Jews are for practice
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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