I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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