I'm pants shitting drunk right now
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
do herpes really smell.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
