At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
