i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Randomize
