Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize
