He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
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