I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
