So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Sponge bath it is.
she smelled like a LAN party
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
