That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
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