So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Just took my morning after pill in the library
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
Randomize
