Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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