just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
I'm going to need your assistance. I cannot walk back to the house in a bear costume.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
