i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
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