yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize
