how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
