There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
