When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Randomize
