Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
