Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize