i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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